It's late and I'm tired so we will make this short and sweet. I had my first day at the new job today. I noticed my stomach is shrinking already. But the weight isn't comming off. And my bulimia is becoming a muscle memory. My stomach wants to purge. It's too full, even when not full. So i am going to resort back to tea drinking. No eating at work. No eating at home. Because of the seperate schedules, lying is going to be more available than ever. I have 6 weeks of training to starve myself and be able to handle the headaches, anxiety, and fatigue without it affecting my job performance. Starting tonight, no food until Wednesday. Again, making goals. Setting myself up for failure. Maybe this time I will be strong. Ana, you are in charge. Eat me whole.
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